I just finished this book entitled “Why I Love Singlehood” by Elisa Lorello and Sarah Girrell on my Kindle this evening. To make a long story short, the book was about a lady named Eva, a former professor turned business owner, who had trials and tribulations of being single. She was working on getting over her ex, and developing new relationships along the way. She even started a blog that listed reasons why she loved being single and her random dates and budding relationships and such. It was a pretty good read. It was light-hearted, funny, and at times I even said “Well damn!!!” super loud. Lol.
The book put a lot of things in perspective for me. Sure I love being single…I don’t have to answer to anyone, don’t have to deal with bullshit that comes with relationships, etc. etc. However, some people believe that you have to embrace being in a state of loneliness if you’re single. I have been asked “Well don’t you ever get lonely?” Who doesn’t??? It’s a state of mind, not so much a physical well-being. So just because I am content with being single I have to be lonely?? No!!! A quote that was interesting reads:
“Singlehood is about finding and committing to the love of your life. I’m talking about the literal love of your life. Being in a place of self-sufficiency, strength, independence, comfort, confidence, and happiness is what matters. No relationship, no matter how seemingly perfect and compatible you are, can give you these things. You have to find them within. You have to bring them to the relationship. Because in the end, you don’t have to be alone to be single. And being single doesn’t mean that you are alone.”
Me personally, I’m in a constant journey of making sure I have everything put together before I even consider putting forth the time and energy into a relationship. So what? That’s how I roll. I’m not afraid to take a trip by myself. I’m not afraid to spoil myself. Why? Because I deserve it!!! I need to take care of me. Bump these other fools who can’t take care of themselves and are expecting someone else to do it! Consider me picky. My mother told me to never ever settle for less. And I will not!! Don’t judge me!! Let me enjoy my life. Let me be content and do what I want to do!! If that’s what singlehood is all about, then damnit I’m content as hell right now! Lol
Also, there are some people who need to embrace singlehood for a while!!! Because they don’t have their ish put together in the first place! They jump into relationships without bringing anything to offer to the table and want to complain about the opposite sex when it doesn’t work. Have you thought about the fact that it may be you and not the other person?? Analyze yourself! Get it together. It takes time.
Last, the good ol cliche’ You have to be able to love yourself before loving anyone else Be comfortable with yourself!! Make sure you are able to function independently!! Make sure you have it all together. No one is going to give you that!! Stop wearing your heart on your sleeve and giving it away if you can’t protect it. “Protect yourself at all times” (lol!) You are the source of your success or demise!
Okay, let me stop…some folks ain’t ready! Stay blessed! Read the book if you so choose!
~* LT *~